Sigh, classicwisconsin sighs, fielding a successful team of footballers in the 21st Century requires a $400 million dollar stadium expansion. Let others debate the pros and cons of football gone bigger than the biggest corporate empires and the incongruity of the last town team in sports becoming an insatiable marketing machine...classicwisconsin is just looking for a good fish fry.

But classicwisconsin will tell you one thing and the one thing is this: If you are going to build a restaurant in Lambeau Field and offer planked walleye and a fish fry and the traditional Belgian soup/stew known as booyah – then you better do it right or take your overrated catering ass back to Chicago.

Northeast Wisconsin is home to the largest Belgian population outside of Belgium (once including the Lambeau family), the place where booyah is nurtured overnight in giant tubs, heated by wood fire and stirred with canoe paddles.

Making booyah is an art form around here, and Rembrandt didn’t use crayons.

In other words, don’t pour a can of Veg-All into a bowl, add two pieces of shredded chicken, make warm in a microwave, and pass off as booyah. Don’t try. Don’t try.

They tried.

Levy Restaurants of Chicago that is. The Packers organization wisely included local restaurants in the food court – Chili Johns is one – but the food service in Curly’s Pub and dining room is provided by Levy, the same folks who cook at the MCI Center, PNC Park and SBC Arena, places that sound as cozy as mom’s kitchen, eh?

In contrast, there is nothing like the booyah made at church picnics in the Green Bay area. Just look at the people running from Sunday mass -- before the final blessing -- with buckets in hand, shoving aside children and nuns to find a place in line.

Curly’s dishes

Joining classicwisconsin on its visit was a lively octogenarian and Green Bay native who regaled the table with stories of Curly Lambeau’s off-the-field exploits. Curly wasn’t too shy about anything, our friend explained, including leaving his salmon-colored convertible parked at a north side whorehouse.

“Word would get out and half the damn town would run out there to look at his car,” our friend reminisced. Similarly, the menu added, “Curly loved fishing almost as much as he would have loved eating our signature, wood-planked walleye. A generous side of citrus-marinated walleye, cooked and served on a wood plank with fisherman’s potatoes and fresh seasonal vegetables. You will remember this dish for a long time."

Yes indeed, it was a night for remembering dishes. The walleye cost $16. Don’t know how much Curly paid for his.

Our friend ordered the walleye and classicwisconsin ordered the lake perch (listed as the Friday Night Fish Fry but served every night.) The waiter returned to say the kitchen was out of planked walleye, but recommended the walleye Cesar salad. This made no sense, because both entrees feature a whopping walleye fillet. The kitchen ran out of potatoes? Vegetables? Planks?

The dining room is surprisingly intimate, with a large fireplace and nice views overlooking the Don Hutson practice facility, the state-of-art Resch Center, the new Veterans’ memorial, as well as the Brown County arena, which looks like a damn dump.

Curly’s Pub, separate from the dining room, is your typical sports bar with one television for every two patrons and huge, chest grabbing nacho platters.

As for the new stadium, what can classicwisconsin say? It’s big. Bright. classicwisconsin recalled gazing at the behemoth after last season’s playoff loss -- the huge thing was all lit up against the cold night sky -- and it looked like the goddamned Titanic.

Maybe in a decade or three the place will grow into its new skin. The statues of Lambeau and Lombardi are impressive. Inside, the historic photos are a nice touch, but classicwisconsin hoped to see a few of the images that real Packer fans cherish: Curly dating his players’ girlfriends; Dan Devine writhing in pain with a broken leg; Ezra Johnson eating a hotdog on the bench; Forrest Gregg twitching uncontrollably; a live turkey strutting in front of Lindy Infante; Mike Holmgren verbally assaulting a fan; or Ray Rhodes chewing gum with a blank look on his face.

In short, Curly’s Pub and dining room scores points for reasonably priced appetizers and entrees as well as generous portions. The food is generally good. Curly’s Pub tries --- admirably -- to localize the menu with lake perch, walleye, and booyah, but the results are mixed. The planked walleye looked delicious. The perch was deep-fried into teeth-shattering briquettes.

And booyah it is not. For the namesake restaurant of a noted local Belgian to serve such swill, well, it’s enough to raise the dead, although there are no reports of Curly’s convertible just yet.

For its 2003-04 public service campaign, classicwisconsin launches a public awareness effort to the stem the tide of bad booyah. Join us in ridding the world of this scourge. Volunteer today. Better booyah today, tomorrow, and for a long time after that.

Dear Levy Restaurants of Chicago, THIS is booyah...